Predict News Headlines

The season of all seasons, Jets go 16-0!!!!!! to equal Dolphins record.

 

"Miller Light: Pat's See Stars After Knockout Kickoff Return"

 

Coles mufflers the the fin fans with 3 td's - Jets 24 Fins 10

Martin churns butter - PAts D not up for power game - Jets 17 Pats 7

It's Miller time - Justin has 2 picks while shadowing Moss - Jets 31 Raiders 24

 

"Opposition Screwed: Jets Reach 16 and F*** Rest of League"

"Jets Reach Sweet 16: Rest of League Suck"

 

"With the First Selection in the 2007 draft, the New England Patriots select...."

 

"Pat's Rats: Brady and Belichick Abandon Sinking New England Ship Midseason."

 

"Oldie Rocks and the Twee Bears: Veteran Martin Puts Chicago in the Porridge"

"Oldie Rocks and the Twee Bears: Veteran Martin Runs Hot, Chicago Go Cold, Scoreline Just Right."

 

Curtis Greets My Favorite Martians

Local sports hero makes contact with planet Zentron, Scientists questions why he was chosen, Zentrons claim Jets fan base, agree to build stadium for free, donate 200 story Curtis statue for groundbreaking ceremony. Running back claims "it's a humbling honor"

 

Jets take off in New England as Chad wings it for 300 yds and 3td's.



I tried.:drunk:

 

*LOL* Hilarious and right on the money.

 

You're getting into your stride now - that one is clever on about 83 different levels.

I'm intrigued by a person who sports an avatar from Aussie Rules, supports an American football team and knows Scottish football headlines off by heart. Is there any sport you don't like?

 

does he make U horny??

does he??

 

MANGOLD TO HAND IN MAN-CARD


After three fumbled snaps in their first three posessions of their opener in Tennesee, Jets rookie center Nick Mangold boarded a plane for Washington, DC where he reportedly will be asked to turn in his man card. A NY Jets spokesman vehemently denied this report.

 

Think it's more that there is no form of football that I don't like, perhaps a little less into Union and League.

Grid Iron is a fantastic game once you understand the rules and a bit of the history of the sport.

Though still find it funny how the Americans say if you win their championship you are "World Champions", when noone else plays the game! If the Australian Rules league here in Australia tried to pull that one they'd be laughed out of town.

The only true football world championship will be taking place in Germany this northern summer: Argentina are my pick.

 

"Man Genie: Coach/Magician Hybrid Grants Jets 3 Wishes: Jets Win Superbowl, Reggie Bush Pledges Himself to Franchise, Herman Edwards turns into Goat."

 

Herm Squirms
With no Curtis Martin, Chiefs coach unable to call a single play in season opener

 

I couldn't resist expanding on this one...

Herm Squirms
With no Curtis Martin, Chiefs coach unable to call a single play in season opener

In the cartoon strip 'Peanuts' the character of Linus often fell apart without his security blanket. Herm Edwards looked a lot like Linus in yesterday's season opener at Arrowhead Stadium.

Edwards, looking cool and confident during the National Anthem, still wore a huge grin during the opening kickoff, which saw his team nicely placed at the 43-yard line.

Then the trouble started. Amid growing confusion on the sidelines (and on the field), the Chiefs took six consecutive delay of game penalties. Quarterback Trent Green looked to the sidelines and repeatedly tapped the side of his helmt, making questioning gestures as if he did not understand the calls that were being sent in.

On the sidelines, Edwards became visibly rattled and started sweating profusely. The look of blank incomprehension on his face was only explained when it became clear that he was calling draw plays - to Curtis Martin.

After the sixth delay of game penalty, Edwards was escorted from the field by stadium security, shouting over his shoulder to 'give the rock to Curtis'.

In the press conference following the Chiefs' 42-3 defeat, Edwards had composed himself once more and joked with the media gathered around him.

'After five years of Curtis Martin left, Curtis Martin right, Curtis Martin up the middle... you get kinda set in your ways,' he said, flashing a broad smile. 'This problem will be ironed out, let me tell you that. Next week we'll be better prepared.'

Asked what his gameplan for next week was, Herm looked temporarily puzzled, before saying 'We'll establish the run by giving the ball to Curtis and then see if we need to change anything in the last two minutes'. Reminded once more that Martin was no longer a part of his arsenal, Edwards again looked blank.

Prodded further that he had a very good running back in Larry Johnson, Herm asked 'Does he have a torn knee ligament? I like running backs with torn knee ligaments.'

Amid the stunned silence that followed this, one reporter asked if throwing the ball was an option, given the presence of Trent Green at quarterback. Herm looked thoughtful and asked whether or not Green was coming off rotator cuff surgery.

'Let's wait until he's had the surgery, then we'll talk about throwing the ball,' Edwards said emphatically. 'Heck, after the surgery I'll rush him back in there and get him throwing. If he re-injures the shoulder during a game I'll put him right back in, that's how committed I am to the passing game, so don't write that I'm not committed to the passing game.'

Making to leave the conference, Edwards called back over his shoulder, 'But we're a running team, make no mistake about that. When you've got Curtis Martin in the backfield you run the ball.'

Edwards, on being reminded once more that Curtis Martin was with the Jets, looked stunned.

In fact, he looked a lot like Linus.

Without the security blanket.

 

ESPN: Jets - Chiefs Game Review:

With 5 minutes left in a 3 - 3 tie game, a distant train whistle sounded that the NY Jets mistook for the end of game whistle. The Jets ran off the field leaving the Chiefs marching unapposed towards the game winning score. 5 minutes later, the game ended in a 3 - 3 tie.