Ten Years Gone

Discussion in 'BS Forum' started by JStokes, Nov 17, 2014.

  1. JStokes

    JStokes Well-Known Member

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    November 17, 2004. Bad day today, see you guys tomorrow


    _
     
  2. soxxx

    soxxx Trolls

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  3. Brook!

    Brook! Soft Admin...2018 Friendliest Member Award Winner

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    Stokes

    Is this the date you lost your wife to cancer? My highest respect to you for raising your kids alone after her departure.
     
  4. Jake

    Jake Well-Known Member

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    Condolences buddy.
     
  5. Cman69

    Cman69 The Dark Admin, 2018 BEST Darksider Poster

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    Stay strong my friend.
     
  6. abyzmul

    abyzmul R.J. MacReady, 21018 Funniest Member Award Winner

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    Until death do us part is a lie.

    There's nothing wrong with loving someone forever.

    Celebrate her life, not with tears of sadness and grief, but with tears of remembrance. Your heart will be much fuller.
     
    Brook! likes this.
  7. IDFjet

    IDFjet Well-Known Member

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    May her memory be a blessing.
     
  8. Royal Tee

    Royal Tee Girls juss wanna have fun
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    Stay strong Stokes....You'll remember her every day when you look at the kids...
    Cherish the great memories..and especially the funny ones..

    r.i.p.
     
  9. JStokes

    JStokes Well-Known Member

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    Thanks fellas, yeah tough day. Never felt sorry for myself for one day when she was sick or even now all these years later--that has always been reserved for my kids and my in-laws-- but I did scream "FUCK" about three times yesterday at completely random times because I still can't believe it. Silly me, sitting there with a bottle of wine, listening to all the songs that reminded me of her, reminded me of having lost her.

    Can't believe I lost my best friend and college sweetheart--it still doesn't seem real or make any sense and every once in a while my mind just shorts out and I let out that primal scream.

    But less for me and more for my in-laws--you should never have to see your children die before you. Great great people.

    But mostly I feel sorry for my kids--my youngest has now lived half his life--ten years--without her. The kid was 4 when she got sick, never really knew her with that full red mane she had, died 8 days before his 10th birthday. He'll be 20 next week. My eldest had just had her sweet 16 a few weeks earlier. As great as all their memories of her were, their memories of her are shrinking in proportion to the continued memories they create everyday. Their memories of her are static, baked for all time as they continue to live their lives and create new memories. No HS graduations, no first day's of college, no college graduations, no awards, no losses, no triumphs, no heartbreaks, no future marriages or breakups, no grandkids--the kinds of moments you want to share with your mother.

    I got lucky and my kids have turned out pretty good, but damn I wish they could have had her for a few more years.

    Ten years gone.

    Can't believe it.

    _
     
    soxxx, 74, Poeman and 2 others like this.

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