Hi, my name is DeathByJets and I’m a loserholic. It has been 24 hours since I last drank the Kool-aid. I have been backing losers since I was 8 years old. I am a fan of the Jets, Mets, and Knicks. I have not backed a winning candidate for President since I have been eligible to vote (5 elections and counting). And my all-time favorite rock band (Rush) will never be elected to the Rock n Roll Hall of Fame. If not for Bill Buckner, I would be 0-for-life. The problem isn’t so much that I back losers, it’s that I convince myself that this time it will be different. Oh, how many times did I say Ewing and the Knicks will beat Jordan and the Bulls. No brainer…Al Gore just has to beat Bush. And this time we will beat the Belichick and the Pats. To the loserholic, you always think you’ve hit rock bottom and things have to improve…and then something like yesterday happens. Brady is out, this is our chance. We are going to make those third down stops. Farve will be able to move the team better than Pennington. With our improved O-Line punching it in from the 1 should be no problem. And then depression sets in. The Sunday night fog after a loss, followed by a Monday of ridicule in the office and reading the NY paper diatribes online. Ugh. By Thursday I’ll be pulling myself out of my loserholic funk, and start to convince myself the Jets can beat the Chargers. And if this season doesn’t turn out as expected, at least I can bask in the certain victory to come from Barack Obama. So, clearly you can see I need help. I’ve decided to enroll in a 12-Step Program: 1. We admit we were powerless over the Same Ole Jets—that our Sundays have become unmanageable. 2. Come to believe that a Power greater than ourselves (I assume this is Brett Favre) could restore us to sanity. 3. Make a decision to turn our remote controls and Sunday Ticket Subscription over to the care of our children…hoping they will pick a better favorite team. 4. Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of our Jets memorabilia. 5. Admit to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of Herman Edwards' wrongs. 6. Are entirely ready to have Eric Mangini remove all these defects of playcalling. 7. Humbly asked Him (Mangini) to remove our short yardage run plays. 8. Make a list of all players/coaches we have verbally harmed, and become willing to make amends to them all. 9. Make direct amends to such players/coaches wherever possible (I’ve mailed bundt cakes to Doug Brien, Leon Johnson, and Rich Kotite), except when to do so would injure them or others (Herm is still causing damage to those poor flustrated bastards in KC). 10. Continue to take personal inventory of pre-season predictions and when we are wrong promptly post it. 11. Seek through prayer and meditation to improve our pass rush and run stopping, praying only for knowledge of Belicheck’s demise and the power to carry that out. 12. Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we try to carry this message to loserholics, and to practice these principles in all our rooting interests. Joe Willie grant us the serenity to accept the games we cannot win, courage to root for the games we can, and wisdom to know the difference. DbJ
KISS of Death? Nahh, Rush will be elected someday. However, if you were a KISS fan? THEN you'd have a case for being a loserholic. That band, as great as they are, and as much as they deserve to be in the RNRHOF, will never be allowed in. (I know someone on the committee... Believe me, no KISS ever!) Also, aren't KISS from Queens? Now that's sad.
I hear ya man... i swear if the Mets don't make the playoffs, I'm going out to have kids just so they can pick new teams to root for
It could be worse, you could root for the Jets & Cubs like I do. That's 140 years of misery right there.
DBJ, the main problem as I see it, is we've acquired Bret Favre, but are still calling plays for Chad Pennington. I do not think we will realize the true potential of our offense or even defense for that matter until after the bye. I know it is painful to be consistently outcoached and outsmarted by the Darth Vader of the NFL, but in the end justice will be served and we will beat the evil bridge troll. Will we win in San Diego? One thing is for sure; we will be playing a team that wants to kill anything that moves; they have to be incredibly irate and willing to take it out to the nth degree on their next opponent who just happens to be the Favre Crew. We have to do a much better job than we did against the Pats if we are to win that game. Is it possible; I can't say. I'd like to believe we can win, but after witnessing the mistakes, penalties, bad coaching, Shanker Graham, Footless Feely, and Jordan's Revenge, admittedly, I do not brim with confidence. BTW, Obama has no chance of winning.
Serenity now DBJ serenity now. Great post DBJ! Seriously this is not the same old Jets, the beauty of time and marking it with the rituals of closing seasons and opening them is we have an opportunity to create new debacles every year that stand out on their own.
DBJ.........I'm right there with ya.... awaiting another Met collapse, still trying to figure out what the hell Mangini was thinking on Sunday Buckner and Messier........the rare bright lights in an otherwise miserable sports rooting life
Look at it this way, Isiah is out and Patrick Ewing Jr is now on the team. Better times are ahead. :up: What were those 12 steps again?