Problem is Section 340

Discussion in 'New York Jets' started by sec314, Oct 21, 2011.

Page 1 of 3
  1. sec314

    sec314 Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Apr 7, 2006
    Messages:
    4,640
    Likes Received:
    1,033
    Problem in Section 340

    In section 340, everyone seems pretty nice but there's this one guy, seems friendly and into the game, and this guy brings enough food inside to feed a family of 6 . So much food packed into a bag, it looks like body parts.Anyway, last Monday night in the 4ht quarter, he started having gas issues, not loud but they really stunk and they got worse as time went on. And it smelled 10 seats down and 3 rows above and below. I could barely breath. And it never stopped. His buddies said he's always like this, in fact on Monday they just ate sandwcihes, normally its cooking lots of meat and spicy side. What should we do? i don't know if the stadium people will say anything or can do anything, but its horrible, it smells like exit 13 on the turnpike. And some women had to leave and come back any suggestions:shit:
     
    #1 sec314, Oct 21, 2011
    Last edited: Oct 21, 2011
  2. BadgerOnLSD

    BadgerOnLSD Banned

    Joined:
    Sep 6, 2004
    Messages:
    15,188
    Likes Received:
    3
    Come over to 316, I promise I won't fart.

    You know that stadium security text thing? Text them and say "SEC 340 FARTS". Just to see what happens.
     
    #2 BadgerOnLSD, Oct 21, 2011
  3. IATA

    IATA Trolls

    Joined:
    Aug 8, 2008
    Messages:
    8,039
    Likes Received:
    0
    get better tickets.
     
    #3 IATA, Oct 21, 2011
  4. 624

    624 Banned

    Joined:
    Apr 26, 2008
    Messages:
    14,894
    Likes Received:
    0
    Bask in it and enjoy it.



    Also, your username is incorrect.
     
    #4 624, Oct 21, 2011
  5. guinness77

    guinness77 Active Member

    Joined:
    Nov 23, 2008
    Messages:
    3,653
    Likes Received:
    0
    Oh, my God, what is that, bratwurst?
     
    #5 guinness77, Oct 21, 2011
  6. bojanglesman

    bojanglesman Active Member

    Joined:
    Jan 24, 2009
    Messages:
    6,123
    Likes Received:
    0
    One-up him and take a dump in the aisle. Everyone loves their own brand.

    [​IMG]
     
    #6 bojanglesman, Oct 21, 2011
  7. MBGreen

    MBGreen Banned

    Joined:
    Feb 28, 2008
    Messages:
    18,107
    Likes Received:
    1
    obviously, you can't hang.
     
    #7 MBGreen, Oct 21, 2011
  8. baamf

    baamf Active Member

    Joined:
    Apr 5, 2004
    Messages:
    3,989
    Likes Received:
    0
    :rofl: Oh great, I think I sit in front of you. I haven't noticed it yet but I missed Monday night. I'll make sure my olfactory glands are working double time this Sunday. I wonder if Lysol is a banned substance when they strip search us...
     
    #8 baamf, Oct 21, 2011
  9. TommyGreen

    TommyGreen Trolls

    Joined:
    Sep 8, 2002
    Messages:
    8,564
    Likes Received:
    2
    Pretty sure the real problem is sec314.
     
    #9 TommyGreen, Oct 21, 2011
  10. sg3

    sg3 Banned

    Joined:
    Sep 25, 2010
    Messages:
    1,534
    Likes Received:
    1


    plus 1

    amen
     
    #10 sg3, Oct 21, 2011
  11. ace_o_spades

    ace_o_spades New Member

    Joined:
    Apr 26, 2008
    Messages:
    14,391
    Likes Received:
    1
    Only billionaires have better tickets.
     
    #11 ace_o_spades, Oct 21, 2011
  12. MBGreen

    MBGreen Banned

    Joined:
    Feb 28, 2008
    Messages:
    18,107
    Likes Received:
    1
    FYP



    *richfillah*
     
    #12 MBGreen, Oct 21, 2011
  13. TommyJ

    TommyJ Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Dec 22, 2010
    Messages:
    2,402
    Likes Received:
    340
    tell him to turn the other way and fire them at the opposing team if they have a chance of reaching the chargers bench. with a good breeze, is section 314 close enough to assault the chargers?
     
    #13 TommyJ, Oct 21, 2011
  14. Section 227. Row 5

    Section 227. Row 5 Active Member

    Joined:
    Mar 4, 2005
    Messages:
    12,562
    Likes Received:
    6
    I have the solution...

    Go to the Chargers game with a gas mask and grille lighter. Exchange seats with the guy who sits directly behind him... believe me, the guy will gladly do that.

    Then ignite the lighter and insert the tip into the crack between the backrest and the bottom of his seat and point the flame directly at his anus.

    The next one he lets rip will probably set his pants on fire and take out all his cronies and the entire row. You might want to consider wearing flame-retardant clothing.

    With 2nd-degree burns over his entire body, he won't be back for months.
     
    #14 Section 227. Row 5, Oct 21, 2011
  15. sg3

    sg3 Banned

    Joined:
    Sep 25, 2010
    Messages:
    1,534
    Likes Received:
    1
    good solution except after the taser mess, not sure it will be so easy to secrete a grill lighter and gas mask through one of the security checkpoints
     
    #15 sg3, Oct 21, 2011
  16. Dierking

    Dierking Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Apr 4, 2006
    Messages:
    16,687
    Likes Received:
    15,717
    reason number 328 why the best place to watch the game is your own living room.
     
    #16 Dierking, Oct 21, 2011
  17. MBGreen

    MBGreen Banned

    Joined:
    Feb 28, 2008
    Messages:
    18,107
    Likes Received:
    1
    where you can bask in your own ass cloud.
     
    #17 MBGreen, Oct 21, 2011
  18. sec314

    sec314 Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Apr 7, 2006
    Messages:
    4,640
    Likes Received:
    1,033
    He's in sec 340 below row 10
     
    #18 sec314, Oct 21, 2011
    Last edited: Oct 21, 2011
  19. porkman

    porkman New Member

    Joined:
    Aug 10, 2010
    Messages:
    8
    Likes Received:
    0
    I think you guys are talking about me. I'm gonna bring my A game now. I'm gonna eat 2 week old eggs for breakfast and spicy jerk wings that will send a cloud over the stadium
     
    #19 porkman, Oct 21, 2011
  20. Mr Electric

    Mr Electric Banned

    Joined:
    Jun 11, 2003
    Messages:
    18,362
    Likes Received:
    1
    This.

    (filler)
     
    #20 Mr Electric, Oct 21, 2011
(You must log in or sign up to post here.)
Page 1 of 3

Share This Page