Several thousand dollars spilled onto the road. https://www.cbsnews.com/news/brinks-truck-drops-hundreds-of-thousands-dollars-indiana-highway/ As if anyone is gonna return any of it unless they're in cuffs. God Bless America! EDIT: Ooops, I meant to say 'on' once in the title. Brain gonna brain. A mod fix if you feel it necessary.
"B, YOU'RE LATE AGAIN!" "Sorry sir.... there was bit of a traffic backup on the way in this morning." "LIKELY EXCUSE, WE EXPECT MORE DEDICATION FROM OUR EMPLOYEES.... AND I DONT SEE THAT FROM YOU" "Actually I pulled over to scrape up a half million off the side of the road, so GFY, I quit"
Ha, I'm honest to a fault (i.e. found a WAD of money once in the super market check out once - I'll tell the story in a minute, but there was no WAY in hell I was keeping it), but in this instance? Damn right I'm stuffing my pockets, especially if that truck had anything to do with either Wells Fargo or Bank of America, two of the most unscrupulous scumbucket banks in the world. I hope the guy that was driving the school bus doesn't get caught. He jumped out and got a BAG of money. I'm talking a literal BAG of money. I can't even imagine how much cash was in it. Guy will go down in family lore as 'Uncle Moneybags'. So, yeah, the supermarket. I was in the express line, kinda distracted, had a few items in my hands, not really paying much attention to anything, but I notice at the last second, the guy in front of me, probably mid-70's, and a teenage girl with him on crutches (grandfather with his granddaughter, because I did hear say, "OK, Grandpa). The guy pays, and they leave. I put my stuff on the belt, and start fishing around for my debit card when I step on something. I look down and it's a HUGE bundle of money with a rubber band around it. It HAS to the that old man's. I quickly snatch it up and throw it in my open purse, and luckily the cashier didn't notice. My initial plan was to try get out of there as fast as possible and see if I could chase them down in the parking lot. Nope, too late. No way I'm turning it in to Customer Service. Money doesn't have people's names on it. I generally trust no-one. So I come up with another plan. As soon as I get home (which takes about 20 minutes), I call the store. "Hi, I was just there a short while ago. I found a big sum of money on the floor. Did anyone come in looking for it yet?" "No, not yet. Do you wanna just bring it back here?" "No. Take down my name and number. As soon as they realize they lost it, I'm sure they'll either call or come running in in a panic. Have them call me right away, and I'll take care of it." "How much is it?" "I'm not telling you that. As soon as they come in or call, tell them that when they call me, they have tell me what the amount is. This way I'll know for sure it's the person who lost it." "OK." Not exactly relevant to the story, but the Customer Service kid had no affect, sounded bored shitless, and dumb as a stick; so if I didn't hear from someone within the hour, I was calling the store back. No more than 5 minutes go by, and this guy calls me up frantic and breathless. "Hello, is this JJJJJ?" "Yes, speaking. How much did you lose?" "$790." "You win!" "I can't believe this! I can't believe this! I can't believe this!" I met him at a local gas station that was convenient for both of us. He was so shocked and happy he almost started crying. He kept trying to push money in my hand as a reward but I absolutely refused. "You have to take at least $20 or you'll insult me. I insist. Buy yourself gas on me." "Oh, fine." Turns out he had just been to the bank about an hour before and cashed his Social Security check. Now I'm not saying someone else wouldn't have done the same thing, but 50/50 some POS would've left an old man short on his bills or hungry. Anyway, stuff like that, it's not a victim-less crime. Well, I say crime even though he wasn't robbed or pick-pocketed, but in my mind, if there's a strong chance of returning money to the rightful owner and you don't, shame on you, it's a crime. That's a prime example of what I call dirty money. Brinks on the other hand, they're insured up the wazoo, and if the money was from more than one institution, FDIC insured. And if it was actually GOVERNMENT $ from the mint or something, enjoy every penny even more, you lucky money-grabbing highway robber baron sons a bitches! EDIT & P.S.: I also once ran after a 30ish year old woman who left her purse in her shopping cart. She barely said thanks. Just kinda grunted and grabbed it from me and slammed her high end car door in my face. Not that I wanted glowing accolades, I was just doing the right thing; but it boiled my blood a little. I tapped on her window and yelled, "YOU'RE WELCOME! NICE MANNERS! I SHOULD'VE THROW IT IN THE STREET ON THE DRIVE HOME! KEEP BEING GRATEFUL FOR THE KINDNESS OF STRANGERS!" She gave me a dirty look, lol. Too bad I didn't make her sweat and waste her damn precious time driving back to the store to see if anyone found it and turned it in. She struck me as precisely the kind of person who hassles and treats food workers and wait staff like crap, and demands to cut the line, any line - because they're them. Oh, well, can't win 'em all.
Reporter: "Several people did call in to turn in money." Not verbatim, but LMAO. No-one did and no-one will. It's a ploy. I got it a little backwards. I thought the school bus driver was the one who grabbed a sack of cash. Oh, well. At least he got several fistfuls in return for a thankless job. Even still, that school bus driver is now Indiana's version of the Barefoot Bandit. I don't know why this incident is so hilarious to me, but it is.
