Any such thing as an ugly vagina?

fenwyr · 03-13-2008, 08:15 PM

So I was doing some business in the bathroom and flipping through my wife's Glamour magazine, and came accross the following bit:

Hey, guys: Is there any such thing as an ugly vagina?

"No way! My advice to women is to love your vagina for all its uniqueness, splendor and glory. But if I had to make a choice about what constitues the 'perfect' vagina, I would choose for it to be in the shape of the New York Jets logo." - Mark Fishbein, 31, New York City

Mark, if you post here, come out and take your bow.

Quack · 03-13-2008, 08:20 PM

Heheh. Could be worse. Could be the Texans logo. That'd just be weird.

abyzmul · 03-13-2008, 08:26 PM

Oh my god yes there is such a thing as an ugly vagina.

Quack · 03-13-2008, 08:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by abyzmul

Oh my god yes there is such a thing as an ugly vagina.

Roast beef sandwich?

VickBlows · 03-13-2008, 08:32 PM

Hate to say it – but definitely. You just haven’t hung out in the right bars yet.

abyzmul · 03-13-2008, 08:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Quack

Roast beef sandwich?

And worse.

VickBlows · 03-13-2008, 08:52 PM

Me and a bunch of friends were at this gig called gasparilla here in Tampa; it’s a big drunken parade that about 300,000 people go to which serves as a perfect excuse for women to act like drunken whores.

Anyway – this smelly pirate hooker came over by our group and I started messing with her to show her tits and stuff – so she starts popping her fried egg tits out which draws the attention of the cops. They start paying a little more attention to her so one cop is pretty much right next to me and I turn my back to her and start talking to the po-po. I don’t know what the hell she was thinking but she tried to jump on my back like a cowgirl so I spun her off and she went flying on the ground. She kicked em’ out wide with a skirt and no drawers on and there it was…the ugliest monkey man has ever laid eyes upon.

It was so gross I told the cop to arrest her immediately for having the most disgusting monkey ever and subsequently blinding me. The cop laughed so hard he blew snot out of his nose…but he agreed that he had no idea what in god’s name he had just seen. He said he has been to fatal car accidents that looked better.

brothermoose · 03-13-2008, 09:05 PM

I don't like the really flappy ones either...you know the kind when you put the lips in your mouth, you could actually deep throat them.

Sounds like you're gasparilla was as good as mine...I spent most of the day educating perspective necklace traders what a motor boat is, much to the chagrin of their significant others. Hey, I got spoiled early on and decided that was the going rate.

Scikotic · 03-13-2008, 09:54 PM

this thread has amazing potential...

come to think of it, I dont think any vagina in the world is good looking. Some are better looking then others, but thats as far as it goes. No beef curtains, and I wont be complaining tho...

Jtuds · 03-13-2008, 09:54 PM

Here's One!!!

abyzmul · 03-13-2008, 10:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jtuds

Here's One!!!

This and Vickblows' post make this thread rock.

rillo · 03-14-2008, 09:22 AM

Yes there is such a thing....

The Predator · 03-14-2008, 10:23 AM

Roast beef vagina's are nothing compared to this chick that I used to work with.

She was pretty good looking, and a slut, which was great. But, after a few of us had taken her out to the car on break, we started discussing certain parts of her anatomy. Most notably, were the tentacles on her vagina.

OK, so they weren't really tentacles, but her labia were ungodly long....like you could tie the damned things into a double knot. It was absoultely discusting. And it actually turned into a huge fight about why the first guy to bang her never told anyone else.

Anyways, word got out in the store, and she eventually got asked about it. Her response was that "When she was a kid, she drank a certain brand of orange juice that she was allergic to, and it made her "lips" swell up and get long." We all proceeded to laugh histerically, never mess around with her again, and call her "Tentacles" until the day she quit.

fenwyr · 03-14-2008, 10:25 AM

I still want to know if this Mark guy posts here. The guy gets in Glamour magazine saying he wants to see a vagina shaped like a Jets logo. Thats priceless.

As to the actual question, I guess I have been really lucky. I've had all shapes and sizes, but all have been quite attractive, in their own alien looking way. I've seen some nasty ones in porn though, that's for damn sure.

Pam · 03-14-2008, 10:37 AM

Oh good lord. There's nothing uglier than a penis.

rmagedon · 03-14-2008, 10:42 AM

Oh man...

...I don't think I ever seen an ugly vagina, but I've had a few smelly ones in my lifetime. Come to think of it, I'd rather take a meaty canvas over beaver roadkill anytime.

rmagedon · 03-14-2008, 10:45 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by PF4JETS

Oh good lord. There's nothing uglier than a penis.

Yeah. Too bad that's not the topic of discussion.

Start a new thread please.

eyedea · 03-14-2008, 10:53 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by VickBlows

Me and a bunch of friends were at this gig called gasparilla here in Tampa; it�s a big drunken parade that about 300,000 people go to which serves as a perfect excuse for women to act like drunken whores.

Anyway � this smelly pirate hooker came over by our group and I started messing with her to show her tits and stuff � so she starts popping her fried egg tits out which draws the attention of the cops. They start paying a little more attention to her so one cop is pretty much right next to me and I turn my back to her and start talking to the po-po. I don�t know what the hell she was thinking but she tried to jump on my back like a cowgirl so I spun her off and she went flying on the ground. She kicked em� out wide with a skirt and no drawers on and there it was�the ugliest monkey man has ever laid eyes upon.

It was so gross I told the cop to arrest her immediately for having the most disgusting monkey ever and subsequently blinding me. The cop laughed so hard he blew snot out of his nose�but he agreed that he had no idea what in god�s name he had just seen. He said he has been to fatal car accidents that looked better.

Awsome........

Pam · 03-14-2008, 10:55 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by rmagedon6

Yeah. Too bad that's not the topic of discussion.

Start a new thread please.

Are you out of your mind? Every guy on here is going to swear their's is prettier.

rmagedon · 03-14-2008, 10:59 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by PF4JETS

Are you out of your mind? Every guy on here is going to swear their's is prettier.

Well, i'm not one to toot my own horn but...

03-13-2008, 08:15 PM	#1
fenwyr Totally Addicted Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: Las Vegas, NV Posts: 9,367 vCash: 400	Any such thing as an ugly vagina? So I was doing some business in the bathroom and flipping through my wife's Glamour magazine, and came accross the following bit: Hey, guys: Is there any such thing as an ugly vagina? "No way! My advice to women is to love your vagina for all its uniqueness, splendor and glory. But if I had to make a choice about what constitues the 'perfect' vagina, I would choose for it to be in the shape of the New York Jets logo." - Mark Fishbein, 31, New York City Mark, if you post here, come out and take your bow.

03-13-2008, 08:26 PM	#3
abyzmul Numchuck Sticks Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: Hy-Brasil Posts: 31,497 vCash: 25	Oh my god yes there is such a thing as an ugly vagina. __________________ *If you gaze long into an abyss, the abyss gazes also into you.* - Bill Cosby *Most people are fools, most authority is malignant, God does not exist, and everything is wrong.* - Ted Nelson

03-13-2008, 08:32 PM	#5
VickBlows Totally Addicted Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: Tampa, Florida Posts: 3,373 vCash: 2000	Hate to say it – but definitely. You just haven’t hung out in the right bars yet. __________________ I reached way back, with an Indian guide The battle I saw…I must have died

03-13-2008, 08:52 PM	#7
VickBlows Totally Addicted Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: Tampa, Florida Posts: 3,373 vCash: 2000	Me and a bunch of friends were at this gig called gasparilla here in Tampa; it’s a big drunken parade that about 300,000 people go to which serves as a perfect excuse for women to act like drunken whores. Anyway – this smelly pirate hooker came over by our group and I started messing with her to show her tits and stuff – so she starts popping her fried egg tits out which draws the attention of the cops. They start paying a little more attention to her so one cop is pretty much right next to me and I turn my back to her and start talking to the po-po. I don’t know what the hell she was thinking but she tried to jump on my back like a cowgirl so I spun her off and she went flying on the ground. She kicked em’ out wide with a skirt and no drawers on and there it was…the ugliest monkey man has ever laid eyes upon. It was so gross I told the cop to arrest her immediately for having the most disgusting monkey ever and subsequently blinding me. The cop laughed so hard he blew snot out of his nose…but he agreed that he had no idea what in god’s name he had just seen. He said he has been to fatal car accidents that looked better. __________________ I reached way back, with an Indian guide The battle I saw…I must have died

03-13-2008, 09:05 PM	#8
brothermoose Totally Addicted Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: ƃuılıǝɔ ǝɥʇ uo Posts: 7,270 vCash: 63	I don't like the really flappy ones either...you know the kind when you put the lips in your mouth, you could actually deep throat them. Sounds like you're gasparilla was as good as mine...I spent most of the day educating perspective necklace traders what a motor boat is, much to the chagrin of their significant others. Hey, I got spoiled early on and decided that was the going rate. __________________ Well Mr. Idzik, I like what you've done with the place so far... BBB President of the self appointed committee to spread the gospel of Bringing Back Braylon

03-13-2008, 09:54 PM	#9
Scikotic Banned Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: Silicon Valley Posts: 11,419 vCash: 1145	this thread has amazing potential... come to think of it, I dont think any vagina in the world is good looking. Some are better looking then others, but thats as far as it goes. No beef curtains, and I wont be complaining tho...

03-13-2008, 09:54 PM	#10
Jtuds Totally Addicted Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: I live in the hearts of the weak and the wounded. Posts: 6,624 vCash: 2000	Here's One!!! __________________ Retire #80 - Wayne Chrebet

03-14-2008, 09:22 AM	#12
rillo Totally Addicted Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: West Palm Beach, via Brooklyn! Posts: 2,531 vCash: 2050	Yes there is such a thing.... __________________

03-14-2008, 10:23 AM	#13
The Predator Totally Addicted Join Date: Dec 2004 Posts: 3,816 vCash: 25	Roast beef vagina's are nothing compared to this chick that I used to work with. She was pretty good looking, and a slut, which was great. But, after a few of us had taken her out to the car on break, we started discussing certain parts of her anatomy. Most notably, were the tentacles on her vagina. OK, so they weren't really tentacles, but her labia were ungodly long....like you could tie the damned things into a double knot. It was absoultely discusting. And it actually turned into a huge fight about why the first guy to bang her never told anyone else. Anyways, word got out in the store, and she eventually got asked about it. Her response was that "When she was a kid, she drank a certain brand of orange juice that she was allergic to, and it made her "lips" swell up and get long." We all proceeded to laugh histerically, never mess around with her again, and call her "Tentacles" until the day she quit. __________________ Unfortunately......I'm a Jets fan.

03-14-2008, 10:25 AM	#14
fenwyr Totally Addicted Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: Las Vegas, NV Posts: 9,367 vCash: 400	I still want to know if this Mark guy posts here. The guy gets in Glamour magazine saying he wants to see a vagina shaped like a Jets logo. Thats priceless. As to the actual question, I guess I have been really lucky. I've had all shapes and sizes, but all have been quite attractive, in their own alien looking way. I've seen some nasty ones in porn though, that's for damn sure.

03-14-2008, 10:37 AM	#15
Pam TGG.com Friendliest Poster Fourpeat!! Join Date: May 2005 Location: 420 Posts: 3,915 vCash: 25	Oh good lord. There's nothing uglier than a penis. __________________ 'If you want something said, ask a man. If you want something done, ask a woman.'" Margaret Thatcher

03-14-2008, 10:42 AM	#16
rmagedon Totally Addicted Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: Sect 332 Row 26...See ya there! Posts: 5,860 vCash: 2389	Oh man... ...I don't think I ever seen an ugly vagina, but I've had a few smelly ones in my lifetime. Come to think of it, I'd rather take a meaty canvas over beaver roadkill anytime.

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