Vote: Funniest Member Award (Sal Alosi Award)

Discussion in 'TheGangGreen.com Poster Awards' started by 101GangGreen101, May 11, 2018.

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The true jester of this board is ...

Poll closed May 25, 2018.
  1. Jetophile

    14 vote(s)
    35.9%
  2. Dierking

    10 vote(s)
    25.6%
  3. Abyzmul

    15 vote(s)
    38.5%
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  1. 101GangGreen101

    101GangGreen101 2018 Thread of the Year Award Winner

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    Sarcastic fucks, but when you are bored sitting at your desk at work, these fuckers seem to make the day much better
     
  2. The Waterboy

    The Waterboy Well-Known Member

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    I think this is one of the hardest to vote on. I guess it is all in what particular type of humor you are looking for. Each of these 3 are equally hilarious but in their own right but also each has their own distinct posting style.
     
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  3. 101GangGreen101

    101GangGreen101 2018 Thread of the Year Award Winner

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    This is gonna be the closest race in my opinion.
     
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  4. matt robinson 17

    matt robinson 17 Well-Known Member

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    3 good choices
     
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  5. xxedge72x

    xxedge72x 2018 Gang Green QB Guru Award Winner

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    @jetophile

    All 3 are awesome, but I want to vote for the underdog here. @jetophile brings an intelligent eccentricity that is awesome pretty much every single post. Very underrated, very awesome. Yet another vote I would choose to split if I could.

    @abyzmul is probably my all time favorite poster on this board.
     
  6. abyzmul

    abyzmul R.J. MacReady, 2018 Funniest Member Award Winner

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    Is it against the rules to fight with the other contestants?
     
  7. Dierking

    Dierking Well-Known Member

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    Probably not but I was raised not to pick on girls and invalids.
     
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  8. The Dark Knight

    The Dark Knight Well-Known Member

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    :D Great choices, as all 3 are funny, but I will go with @abyzmul.
     
  9. Brook!

    Brook! Soft Admin...2018 Friendliest Member Award Winner

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    @abyzmul grilled me hard when I first joined the board for saying “Only in America”

    @Dierking hates me because I am a Muslim soccer lover.

    @jetophile never attacked me so I voted for her.

    Now in time I became an @abyzmul fan but never became a @Dierking fan. Strange enough though I still like him. @jetophile though is like the grandma I never had. She is always sour on something and rightfully calls her Mrs championship69. If I could I would vote all three. Oh well.
     
  10. NYJalltheway

    NYJalltheway Well-Known Member

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    I broke the tie for ya Byz, you asshole. :)
     
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  11. abyzmul

    abyzmul R.J. MacReady, 2018 Funniest Member Award Winner

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    Bahahaha you called her a grandma.
     
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  12. Attackett

    Attackett Well-Known Member

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    2 of them are very funny but the fact that Jetophile can still be very funny despite being Mrs. Championjets69 gets the edge.
     
  13. Dierking

    Dierking Well-Known Member

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    Your opinion on what is and isn’t funny is kind of meaningless since you never get the joke.
     
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  14. matt robinson 17

    matt robinson 17 Well-Known Member

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    I voted for you, I get your humor...........I think!
     
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  15. Brook!

    Brook! Soft Admin...2018 Friendliest Member Award Winner

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    You got a point. :(
     
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  16. jetophile

    jetophile Bruce Coslet's Daughter

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    Celebrity Death Match, biaaaaaaaaaaattttch!
     
  17. jaywayne12

    jaywayne12 Well-Known Member

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    dierk and jeto are two of my favorite posters...they are INCREDIBLE. Only thing is ABYZ has had me cracking up for 14 years.
     
  18. jetophile

    jetophile Bruce Coslet's Daughter

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    I'm older than dirt (54), but I can't technically be a Grandma because I don't have children. I couldn't give two shits about my age, but that is very VERY funny, I gotta admit. Which leads me to m 'Disability Grandma Story'.

    I had a co-worker a few years back who was in her early 70s. Not too frumpy, but a little old-fashioned. One of our patients, in his late 80s, was this absolutely hilarious Jewish gentleman who would tell these AMAZING jokes every time he had an appointment. He would come to the front desk practically rubbing his hands together to regale us and unleash. The jokes were always original and never stale. Some of them weren't very politic, some of them were this side of raunchy, but damn, were they ever funny. What a great sense of humor. Trust me, I'm going somewhere with this.

    We also had some mentally disabled patients from a group home that used to come in for care once a month. Wow, what a program. It has become somewhat of a model that's being repeated because of its success in keeping forgotten people out of institutions whose parents passed away or were basically abandoned by family. The woman who managed and ran the home (now retired), what a wonderful person, and was she ever good at what she did. All of the women who lived there had an excellent quality of life. It wasn't a facility. It was an actual HOME home. As in a house. Anyway, all of the women were in their mid-40s and upwards and completely incapable of fending for themselves or living on their own. They did, however, have a sense of community, familiarity, and emotional and physical security.

    This one patient, Debbie, was a real pip. She wasn't beyond 3 years old in mental capacity/development and didn't speak in full sentences. She was also very sweet, very funny, and VERY loud. She would burst in the door of the office and yell, "HIIIIIIIIII!!!!! HIIIIIIII!!!!! HIIIIII!!!" Then her aide would bring her to window to sign her in and she would point at my co-worker and yell, "LADY! LADY! LOOKEE LADY!!!!" It was more than obvious that she trying to communicate something other than the fact that my co-worker was a woman, but we were never sure what. The aide makes her sit down in the waiting room and tells her to quiet down. So said hilarious elderly Jewish patient gets up and comes to the window, starts laughing and says (in a very nice way) that she sounds like Jerry Lewis (HEY, LAAAAAAAAAAAAADDDDDDDDDY!) and goes to sit back down. Out of nowhere, Debbie suddenly bolts to the window, points at my co-worker, and screams at the top of her lungs, "GRANDMA!!!! GRANDMA!!!! GRANDMA!!!" That's what she wanted to say all along, but it was like a light switch got flipped by unseen forces. My co-worker went red as a tomato.

    Elderly Jewish patient starts losing it. He can't help himself. Debbie runs back into the waiting room, sizes him up, and then screams, "GRANDPA!!!!" He was laughing so hard, I thought he was gonna fall out of his chair. So Debbie kept alternating between Grandma and Grandpa for twenty minutes, as loud as a bullhorn, complete pandemonium. Here's a couple of his: "How does a JAP commit suicide?" "I don't know. How?" "She piles up all of her designer sweaters and jumps off." "What's a Jewish dilemma?" "I don't know. What?" "Free ham." Hahaha, RIP Harold Kohn. You are missed.
     
    #18 jetophile, May 14, 2018
    Last edited: May 14, 2018
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  19. Dierking

    Dierking Well-Known Member

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    Jeto is obviously tanking for better picks next year
     
  20. jetophile

    jetophile Bruce Coslet's Daughter

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    Well, I do have an aquarium with some Gouramis, but lol. You got my vote.
     
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